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Hey readers!  

  A few years back, my (at the time) 10 year old nephew out-of-the-blue asked me “What’s a hipster?”  I really didn’t know how to explain what that is because I never really understood the answer to that myself, nor did I care to research. 

  One curious day, I searched online to see exactly what hipsters are, and from what I’ve gathered, they’re usually in their 20s or 30s, strictly listen to indie rock, smoke cigarettes, frequent sites such as  Pitchfork and Tumblr, drink cheap crappy beer, wear vintage/thrifted clothing, are pretentious trust fund babies who have tonnes of pointless tattoos (including triangles, anchors, unicorns and quotes they don’t even understand or live by), are clique-y snobs and live to be ironic (hypocritical) and obscure (I hate that word).  They hang out at Starbucks. They only use Apple products and will always have their iPod/ iPhone/ iPad on them. They say things like, “You know- that band ____... you probably haven’t heard of them” or “I liked_____ before it was cool to like ____... now that they’re too mainstream, I don’t like them anymore.”  They basically always have the attitude that they’re better than you in every possible way. Annoying. There are so many other qualities that sites have used to describe the stereotypical hipster, but the list is just too damn long.  Fedoras.  

  Funny thing is, after I looked up different sites explaining/mocking hipsters, I start to encounter them, left, right and center... so I thought.  They don’t all have tattoos, they don’t always necessarily wear vintage or thrifted clothing (as some sites that mock them claim they try to pull off clothes from Urban Outfitters as thrifted), age doesn’t matter- I’ve met older “hipster” types.  Not all necessarily have trust funds.  Not all do drugs or smoke cigarettes.  Not all drink Pabst. 

They're everywhere.
  Are they all ironic?  I really can’t say since I never met all the hipsters in the Toronto area, so I cannot really generalize.  What I DO know is that the hypocritical, “obscure”, clique-y, snobbish, pretentious, self-important, tattoo-covered, cheap-beer drinking qualities aren’t limited to hipster culture.  As I’ve hit up mainstream shops in the mall, I’ve noticed that not only has “hipster fashion” been adopted by the mainstream, but the “stereotypical hipster state of mind” has been as well, so I guess every other person can physically pass as a certified hipster in passing by, making it possible for the true hipsters to go incognito.  

  Therefore, I guess in order to truly identify a hipster is to get to know them like any other person... but honestly, who cares?  Not to defend hipsters (because honestly, between the way they're described online and the true stereotypical few I've met, they're simply just a bunch of tools), but the real ones apparently wouldn't admit to anyone that they are considered hipsters anyway, so why the labels?  Well, besides tools. 

  Hipsters apparently hate anything mainstream, so... with their lifestyles, and way of dressing becoming so
Hipster Flowchart.
mainstream, is this their way of being ironic?  I almost wish I never did a web search for hipsters because getting to know their stereotypes is nothing but one big, fat, confusing, eye-squinting mind-fuck.  I really don't care either way- people are either likable, or not.  Let hipsters be hipsters- if they annoy you, simply steer clear of their hangouts.

  On to the subject of "hypsters" with a "y".  I call it hypster with a "y" because it's a word combo (or, for all you devoted Jamsterdam readers/listeners, a "wombo") of hypocrites and hipsters.  We live in a society full of hypocrites.  Double-standards ARE the standard.  We live in a “do as I say, not as I do” culture that is slowly breeding an entirely new generation of idiots, where double-standards are the standard.  Here are a few examples of what I think people should be reminded of before teaching the new generations exactly how to be the hypocritical morons we all know and love:

-In Canada, most of us are immigrants (whether first generation, or not) and everyone living here can proudly wave the flags of their cultural background/country of origin... everyone but Americans living here. Quite a number of Canadians hate Americans for no reason besides what they see in the media, and as an American living in Canada, it is quite the insulting double-standard, especially during soccer season or the Olympics. 

  For example, if some nationalist from some foreign country arrives to Canada, they still talk about how great their culture is- they go on about the food, the lifestyle, the land, everything is just better in every way than everyone else’s culture.  If an American were to do the exact same thing, others get huffy-puffy, calling out ridiculous claims such as “You’re just from a war-mongering, football-watching, animal-cruelty promoting, gun-slinging, first-rate-terrorist country with a long history of slavery, racism and ignorance, you stupid Yankee!  You and your stupid country are the reasons why our country and the rest of the world’s economy is fucked!!!”  Canadians: Why so much hate towards Americans?!?  If Americans were to call out the bullshit of the other cultures, it would be considered prejudice and racist.  How the hell is that even fair???

-If a white person calls another white person “White Trash”, it’s considered funny, but if anyone else says it, it’s considered racist.  Same goes for black people using the “N” word- it’s okay until a non-black person else says it.  I say, if you can say it, anyone else should have the freedom to do so as well- otherwise, maybe it’s time you stop using these terms on each other, whether in slanderous terms, or not.  I hate both terms and I’m not white, nor am I black.  This always boggled my mind.

-Freedom of speech: I’m pretty sure in Canada we’re entitled to expressing our opinions, and be open to debate if necessary.  When I speak my mind or express my opinions whether through text or verbally, I do not expect everyone to agree with me- I am actually usually prepared for debates about topics, especially if the topic is controversial.  You are entitled to your opinion, and I encourage more people to speak their minds, but it’s all a matter of staying on topic without personally bashing someone's lifestyle or anything else unrelated to the original topic.

  I've officially gone on quite the all-over-the-place rant, so I'll stop there for now.  Conclusion: Hipsters and the like (if true to their personality stereotypes) annoy the hell out of me, but I accept the fact we co-exist, and double-standards should stop being so standard.  If you're a hipster reading this and it offended you: sorry- it's just an opinion piece and you're free to comment down below or bitch me out via Twitter: @JerZGrlinCanada

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