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Hey Readers!

Here is a compilation of old random Facebook statuses I wrote a few years ago, and thought I would share them with you!  Enjoy! 

1.  You could esthetically be the most beautiful girl in the world, but if you have a horrible attitude you will be easily placed on a pedestal on the top of the ugly list.

2.  Just because you're single, doesn't necessarily mean you're looking.  It also doesn't mean you're desperately looking for "the one", & it certainly doesn't mean you're "available, and looking for a nice warm winter beater".  There is absolutely nothing wrong with being single and focusing on your own life.  You should be your first priority, then everything else will follow naturally.

3.  Move on from your fears and turn them into accomplishments, success and passion for what you love.... and make negative words and thoughts illegal.  This can obviously apply to all aspects of your life.

4.  I've come to the conclusion that if we all ended up with the person we're truly meant to be with, there would be no such thing as divorce.  Even the most f***ed up people out there have a perfect match- it's just a matter of not settling for less than you want.

5.  At times, we don't know what we have until it's gone.  Most of us will live day-to-day and take what we do have for granted.  Appreciate everything and everyone good you have in your life.  Material things are fun and will make you smile until you're sick of them, but life experiences with the ones you love are investments and the memories will last forever.
  • 6.  Men who say, "Why buy the cow, if you can get the milk for free?"  Woman's response is: "Why buy whole pig when all u want is a little sausage?"

    My soul would smile if I saw this in Canada.  My waistline wouldn't.
    7.  Canada needs to seriously replace all of the McDonald's and Denny's locations with In-N-Out burger and IHOP.  All of them. 

    8.  You cannot help someone unless they are willing to help themselves.  C'est la vie..

    9.  If you're doing better than others in any way, they hate on you or find a reason to hate you.  Let there be more lovers, not haters.  We should all be happy for each other- whether we landed a dream career, found love, had a baby, look and feel great, dress well, travel the world, etc... just finding happiness in something (provided we're not rubbing it in people's faces constantly)- we should love, admire and be inspired by each other.

    10.  Life is like climbing a mountain: You start off alone and meet people on your journey to the top; some will help take you higher and rest with you as you catch your breath on a plateau, others latch on to you like dead weight, drag you down and discourage you.  Ditch the dead weight and move forward.

    11.  Have you ever grabbed fast food, walked towards a gym window where you can see people running on treadmills that faced the window and ate your thick and juicy cheeseburger in front of them while staring blankly at your reflection in the window while eating your burger slowly?  I did. It was pure awesome.

    12.  I think the saying "Love is blind" is a croc of bull.  Love is "Seeing all, and accepting all."

    13.  Sometimes I wish I were a digital camera so I could just selectively wipe out any memory I want from my SD card. But the reality is, I'm a human with a VERY vivid memory.  I know people can tell you stuff like, "You're just a spec of dust on this huge planet, in this huge galaxy, in this HUGE Universe, and with all that's going on in the world, your problems are small- get over it- YOU'LL LIVE".  Easy for them to say. Not their problems.  They're YOUR problems, it's YOUR life, you have deal with it in your own way- don't ever let anyone tell you your problems mean nothing because OBVIOUSLY they do mean something to YOU. 

    14.  I've heard the comparison a few times between finding the perfect mate, to finding the perfect handbag.
    It's true though! Some handbags are only meant to be used for a season and then chucked out when it gets old, and others are worth keeping for a lifetime because they're so high quality and loved every day. You WILL find that perfect handbag!

    15.  3 Things to remember in life:
    1.) Live with no regrets. 
    2.) Accept that everything happens for a reason. 
    3.) If it's meant to be then it will happen.

    16.   On one hand, you could get mad at that annoying moment where the sales chick at Calvin Klein is ruthlessly hitting on your boyfriend instead of just helping him pick out a size and f*** off, -OR- you can smile at the whole thing because the chick must be too insecure about her long labia to get her own man, so she gets a sick satisfaction in hitting on male customers who have girlfriends.  Ladies, take the high road: Smile. Her vagina most likely looks like folded deli meat.  :) 

    17.  If guys "tea bag", what's it called when a girl does it? "Suction cupping"?

    18.  Here's a little exercise if you want to feel good all year:

    1.) Write down everything in your own life that you're thankful for.

    2.) Write down a list of personal goals you want to achieve.
    3.) Stick it somewhere you can see it every day.

    19.   HORRIBLE Monday.  I can say "FML" but that's a tad over dramatic... I've just gotta be thankful for the good people in my life, my health, life's great opportunities, and the fact tomorrow's a new day.

    20th thought: A tiny glossy-eyed puppy.

    Tweet me @JerZGrlinCanada
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