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Other Names For Facebook
Thursday, December 19, 2013
  Facebook used to be "A Place For Friends".  A few years ago, I was personally convinced by a few different people to get an account to reconnect with old friends I haven't regularly interacted with, particularly old neighbors, schoolmates, etc.  At first, it seemed kind of cool to see how much people have changed over the years, and getting to catch up and see how they have been doing.

  I've noticed lately that at the Sign In page, it doesn't state that it is "A Place For Friends" anymore... probably because it has been a good site to actually end friendships on, based on what people post, who is on their "Friends list", who's lurking who, etc... not everyone will like everything you post- no one is safe- if you are active on social networking sites, you are guilty of posting things others find annoying.

Now I'm convinced Facebook should be called any of the following names:

-Babybook: A place to talk about/post photos of your baby's every meal it eats, every shit it takes, and every piece of clothing you bought for it.

-Bitchbook: See "Ventbook"; A place to bitch about everything from the traffic, the weather, your job, something you saw on t.v, or your crappy life.

-Bragbook: A place to brag about how fabulous your life is, or at least make it seem better than it actually is.

-Bullybook:  A place to insult anyone and everyone you can via making pointlessly rude comments on things they post online, whether they were up for debate or not.  It would actually be scary if people actually talked to others in real life the way they do online.  People can get real ballsy behind a keyboard.

-Debatebook: See "Opinionbook"; A place to get into/start heated debates, even if you're constantly trailing off topic. People enjoy debating anything from politics, and religion, to what is/isn't appropriate to post online.

-Duckfacebook: A place to post various photos of yourself (selfies) puckering your lips at the camera,
which makes you resemble a duck.  It's apparently supposed to be sexy or cute.  It's not.

-Foodbook: A place to post photos of every meal you're about to eat, without necessarily sharing the recipe, or what restaurant you're eating that dish at.

-Friendship Ending Book: A place to cause drama with others by saying insulting things online that you would never have the guts to say to their face, resulting in ending friendships and deleting those said individuals off your "Friends List".

-Gamebook: A place where you log in and play games while sending out annoying invites to your "Friends List" to play these games that they don't care about.  Other games include the ones where women post a bra color as a status without saying why, and how it's supposed to raise breast cancer awareness somehow.

-Linkbook: A place to only share links to other sites.  You can share the link to this blog as well.

-Lurkbook: See "Stalkerbook"; A place to lurk other people's profiles, their photos, updates, etc., for absolutely no good reasons.  A prime example is lurking your exes- they're in the past for a reason- unless you're both mature enough to stay friends/keep in touch both in real-life and/or online, maybe...I dunno... forget about them??

-Memebook: A place to share memes (photos with words on them) that others have created, without coming up with your own original opinions, or sharing your own photos.

-Mobile Uploads Book: A place to post up photos you took from your trusty smartphone, making everyone and their mother a "photographer".  What ever happened to taking the time to take high-res photos and uploading them from your SD Card?  Too old school?

-Opinionbook: See "Debatebook"; A place to to type out your opinions of various topics, and maybe stir up debates.

-PDAbook: A place for couples to post selfies of them kissing each other and stuff like "I love you, <insert disgustingly mushy pet name here>" all over each other's profiles for everyone and their mother to see.

-Petbook: See "Babybook"; A place to post updates and photos of everything and anything your pet does, including every visit to the vet, every shit it takes, everything it eats, a close-up of its face on every single different angle you could possibly capture.

-Promotebook: A place to promote your upcoming projects and invite your entire list of friends to events, even if they live a 20-hour flight away.

-Stalkerbook: A place to creep through other people's pages, whether you know them or not.

-Tits 'N' Ass Book: A place where you post photos of any part of your body BUT your face. Half-naked bathroom selfies.

-Ventbook: See "Bitchbook"; A place to vent it out about anything and everything.  Could lead to online arguments... see "Debatebook".

  No matter how you use Facebook, or any other social media sites, honestly, it's really not your decision as to what others choose to share so if you don't like what others have to say or post on their own profiles, you DO have the options to hide their updates or delete/block them, or deactivate your own profile altogether if you hate the website so much.

  I say, post what you want- it's your profile- we're all going to annoy someone somehow.  I'd also suggest that maybe it's a good idea to refrain from telling others what they can and cannot share on their own profiles- it's like walking into someone else's house and immediately telling them how to redecorate their own home, without them even asking for your opinion.  Just saying.


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