Hello, my sexy readers!The question of the week is: Can long-distance relationships actually work?
Like any relationship, long-distance relationships require the vitals: A whole lot of trust, communication, patience and honesty. This Jersey Girl has tested the waters in previous years- whether they lived a 5-hour drive away, or a 5-hour flight away. In my last long-distance relationship, dude lived a 6-hour drive away in Michigan, and the biggest issue was lacking compatibility, lack of respect, and too much talk about politics (it was during the Presidential elections in 2008) so it lasted a grand total of 4 1/2 months. Like any relationship, it could be hard work, but sometimes that hard work is totally worth it.
Really the only differences are:
- The fact the only time you can see the other person is via Skype, or when you visit each other.
- You need to be a little more organized in terms of maybe scheduling times you talk if the other person is in a different timezone and your schedules conflict. If you say you're going to call, then call, unless you text and let the other person know if something comes up. If this happens too frequently, though, the other person may not be patient enough for you and forget your ass.
- If living beyond driving distance, you can't just spontaneously call the person to see if they're free in a few hours to hang out, unless you have your own private jet.
- No sex, unless you've mutually agreed it's an open-relationship.. in that case it's a risk if a lover outside of the relationship (or the girl in the relationship) gets pregnant.. then it becomes an episode of Maury.- Your relationship is mainly based on compatibility. If your personalities click and seem to compliment each other well, a 6-hour phone conversation could pass by like it was only 10 minutes.
- It could be torture not seeing the other person for long periods of time, but if you have a strong enough bond and mutual respect for each other, the pain will become a gain- like doing squats.
- You don't see each other often enough to have an argument followed by make-up-sex to fix things, so it really is a test on how well you mutually understand each other and hash it out verbally, like adults do.
- If things get serious and you're considering moving in together, you have to figure out which one of you is going to move away from the life you've established in your hometown- or if both of you agree to move to some random city/town where you're both new.
If the both of you can handle these things, pick your battles, have faith, and appreciate the time you have together, chances are, it will work out.
In local relationships, you set aside quality time for your partner, correct? You can do the same exact thing in terms of phone calls, except you're not right next to each other, unless you're planning a trip. In that case, one person may take a few days off of work, or not, depending on the situation.
I'm a firm believer that you don't HAVE to see each other every day, unless you live together.. not that I'm knocking those of you who are all about that. Even if you live together, it's not like you're forbidden to go on vacations (or out in general) without each other. I'm just saying- it doesn't matter the time apart, or the distance- if you have something real with each other, you'll make it work.
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Either way, any relationship out there isn't for the lazy- it's hard work- some tougher than others. If you both put the hard work in, you get what you put into it. Some people settle with the boy next door that they've known since they believed in the tooth fairy, others don't find their partner until they hit their 30s, while on the other side of the world.
So the answer: Yes. Long-distance relationships can absolutely work out. Sometimes life gives you the choice between a totally meaningless, yet physical relationship with someone local; or something real with someone that lives far away (with one hell of a foundation through strong communication) that can potentially last forever.
Those of you reading this and are entertaining the idea of a long-distance relationship- I encourage you to go for it! Go into all your relationships in life with a positive outlook while leaving any baggage you may have at the door.
@JerZGrlinCanada
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